


Sipping On Straight Chlorine

by b_ndito



Category: Hiveswap, Homestuck
Genre: Flushed Romance | Matesprits, M/M, Pale Romance | Moirallegiance, Quadrant Confusion, Quadrant Vacillation, Unrequited Love, ra ra oh na na roma oh lala gaga ooh lala want your bad romance, some kissin, yikes!!, you and me could write a bad romaaaaance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-05
Updated: 2019-04-05
Packaged: 2020-01-05 05:59:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 633
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18360044
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/b_ndito/pseuds/b_ndito
Summary: Fall out of formation;I plan my escape from walls they confined.Rebel red carnation;Grows while I decay,I'm running for my life.





	Sipping On Straight Chlorine

**Author's Note:**

> scrapped scene from a fic i'll never finish but wanted to upload this little moment anyways <3333

“Don’t… don’t do this to yourself.” 

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“Don’t fall in love with me.“

 

Xefros carded his fingers through the smaller troll’s hair and smiled against his face. His cheeks were warm with a blush and his eyes were closed. “But I can’t help it.”

 

Dammek leaned back into the kiss, his chest numb, his fingers intertwined with Xefros’s. The Ariborn above him hummed in response, his hand sliding to the back of the Taurcer’s head. This was bad, the entire thing was just awful. 

 

It didn’t feel right because it wasn’t. 

 

The chair that he was (that... _ they _ were) sitting in was a less-than-comfortable place to be practically making out. The lights were far too bright inside to make the setting even remotely romantic, and the rumbling sound of the air ducts in Dammek’s hive made for a distasteful background noise. 

 

Maybe this could have all been avoided. Maybe if he hadn’t exploited Xefros’s red feelings towards him, Dammek wouldn’t have been tangled up in this mess; this disgusting mess. Using kisses to get what he wanted seemed like such a clever idea at the time, he didn’t even consider that he might trick himself too, in the process.

 

“Please don’t say that,” Dammek said, almost too quietly for Xefros to hear, holding himself back from sounding upset. “You have no idea.”

 

Xefros papped his moirail’s face gently. “You don’t have to feel guilty.”

 

Guilty? That word didn’t even begin to cover it. He felt ashamed. Weak. Selfish. The list went on and on and on. The hand that he had rested on Xefros’s waist moved to press against the Ariborn’s chest; a weird semi-defensive gesture to keep Xefros away from him. He had never heard of anyone having to protect their own moirail from themself. 

 

“This won’t lead to anything good, Xefros.”

 

“How do you know?” The Ariborn challenged, quietly. He moved his hand from the side of Dammek’s face to his shoulder. “I thought defying boundaries was a  _ good  _ thing.”

 

“This is different.”

 

“It’s not.”

 

“It  _ is _ , Xefros.”

 

Despite keeping their fingers intertwined on one hand, Dammek pressed his other hand more into the other troll’s chest, this time urging him away. Xefros frowned and dropped his gaze to where their hands were interlocked. 

 

A pause. “Then let go.”

 

Silently, Dammek stared at him, confounded. He couldn’t just  _ let go _ . The hand on Xefros’s chest turned to a fist as he grabbed the shirt and pulled the Ariborn back down to kiss him again. He ended the contact abruptly, keeping his face close to Xefros’s and doing his best to keep himself in check. 

 

“You have to stop coming back.” His grip on the rustblood’s shirt tightened. “Please stop coming back.”

 

Xefros sighed. “It doesn’t bother me. As long as I’ve got you, it really doesn’t bother me, Dammek. I don’t care.”

 

“Can’t you understand that I lied to you? That I used you?”

 

“I can.”

 

“Can’t you understand that our moiraillegiance meant nothing to me?” The Taurcer paused. “I don’t love you, Xefros. I really don’t.”

 

The Ariborn fell quiet, avoiding Dammek’s gaze. A moment or two passed before he got up from the other troll’s lap. Standing there, Xefros remained silent while Dammek’s thoughts ran wild. It had never been a secret, had never been something for Dammek to hide. After all, he had never told Xefros that he loved him, because he just didn’t.

 

“Then why do you make me feel like it?”

 

“Like what?” 

 

Xefros paused. “Like you love me.”

 

Dammek frowned. “This,” he motioned between the two of them, “isn’t what it feels like to be loved. I do not love you, do you understand? Just go.”

 

The rustblood nodded silently, hanging back a moment or two before he departed from the hive. 


End file.
